In a recent episode of Solomon’s Talk podcast, I spoke with Debbie Baisden, a remarried widow and mother of four teenage boys. Debbie’s story is one of resilience and faith in the midst of loss and the challenges of solo motherhood after the sudden loss of her husband. In this blog post, I address the key takeaways from this heartfelt interview.
Who is Debbie Baisden?
Debbie describes herself as a “crazy mom of four teenage boys” and a “remarried widow.” Her life is filled with the chaos and noise that come with raising four boys and two rescue dogs. But it’s a life she wouldn’t trade for anything.
The Unthinkable Happens
In the summer of 2012, Debbie’s life took a tragic turn when her husband Aaron passed away unexpectedly. At the time, her boys were just eight, seven, and four (twins). The sudden loss left her grappling with how to break the devastating news to her young children. “How do you drop something so heavy on such tender hearts?” she wondered.
The Challenges of Solo Motherhood
Debbie found herself navigating the complexities of solo motherhood overnight. She had to become the only foundation for her children. With no one with whom to share the responsibilities or make decisions. “There was also no threat. I could not threaten my children with ‘wait till daddy gets home,'” she said.
The Importance of Transparency
One of the most poignant moments in the interview was when Debbie spoke about her approach to grieving in front of her children. She chose to be transparent about her emotions, allowing her kids to see her at her most vulnerable. This openness gave her children the freedom to express their own feelings and understand that it was okay to be sad, angry, or confused.
Guilt and Moving On
Debbie also touched on the guilt she felt after her husband’s death. From the guilt of smiling again to having the freedom to find love again, she discussed the emotional rollercoaster that many widows go through. However, she emphasized that it’s crucial to allow yourself the space to heal and move forward.
Faith in the Midst of Loss
Debbie’s faith was a constant source of strength for her, she said throughout the course of the discussion. Do not put off developing a closer relationship with God until you are in a bind, she said.
Debbie’s Work Today
Today, Debbie runs two fitness and nutrition businesses aimed at helping busy moms feel their best. She believes that when moms are at their best, they can better pour into their families. Her businesses, Fit with Deb and Mom Sanity, offer convenient solutions for moms to incorporate fitness into their busy lives.
Debbie Baisden’s story is a testament to the strength and resilience that can be found in vulnerability. Her journey through grief, solo motherhood, and rediscovery serves as an inspiration for all, but especially for solo moms navigating similar challenges. Maybe her finding strength from her faith in the midst of loss will inspire you to remember that you’re not alone.
Watch the video below for the full interview or visit @solomomstalktv on YouTube.