How to Stop Unimportant People from Stealing Your Joy

Introduction

Every human is important. But sometimes we give too much room to unimportant people to steal our joy.  These are people who don’t hold any sway in your life.  They can’t make your life better. But yet we allow them to influence how we act. Don’t let these people take up space in your head.

Everyone is important. Everyone has value. But if a person belittles you. If they are condescending or even downright mean to you. Then why are you thinking about them? Why are you wasting your valuable time on them? Why pray tell would you allow that person to control your mind? Ask yourself this question: “If I wasn’t so upset over this person, what would I be free to do?”

I interviewed Dr. Roberta Shaler who talk about how these types of unimportant people can take control or our lives. She describes them as “hijackals”. Because they have made it their purpose in life to hijack your life. Sadly some of these people are not considered unimportant people in our lives. They could be “mom” or “partner” or “friend”. You can watch the video below for the full interview.

Why It Matters to Ignore Unimportant People

To live the life you want you need a clear head. You need to be able to see the vision for yourself so you can decide what your life purpose is. If you allow unimportant people to cloud your judgment then it’s hard to focus on your own sense of self. Because those people major in minimizing who you are as a person. Don’t. Let. Them.

Let Unimportant people out of your mind

You still love them. But it’s time to change your mindset. You are in control. And you will have to give an account for your own life. It won’t be enough to say some other person made you do something or think a certain way. Giving unimportant people power over your thoughts and decision will render your own life meaningless.

Your mind is very valuable real estate. Your brain is capable of amazing things. Release yourself from tyranny. This person may be your boss or a relative so it may be hard to separate from them physically. But you can mentally discharge them from your life.  Protecting your mind is good self-care.

My method:

Release them.

Recalibrate your way of thinking about them.

Refuse to let them seep into and squat in your mind.

How?

• Don’t blame yourself. Even if you made a mistake don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it.  Don’t condemn yourself and don’t allow anyone else to either. Jesus doesn’t condemn you.
• Forgive the person. Forgive yourself.
• Focus on finding something to take your mind off the negative thoughts.
• Remind yourself that in your life and in the grand scheme of things this person doesn’t matter.

But the one thing I’ve found to help me stop unimportant people from stealing my joy is to pray for them.  Not the kind of prayer David sometimes prayed.  No. Pray for their wellbeing just like you would a friend.

My Personal Story

I learned this lesson from my pastor.  I had a guy at work who made it his side hustle to rob me of my joy.  This bully took pleasure in harassing single moms.  

I endured many sleepless nights worrying about losing my job.  Because this guy used lies to make his accusations official. My experience is what inspired this post.

One day my pastor asked if anyone in the congregation had trouble sleeping because someone on the job was bothering them.  I have no clue how he knew.  I didn’t tell anyone.

He went on to tell us to pray for that person.  Call their name.  And tell God to help you forgive them.  I did that and discovered that when you pray for your enemy you disempower them from robbing you of your joy.

I made a mental shift and the situation at work shifted for the better as well.

Don’t let unimportant people steal your joy.